


Stars bloom from your fingertips (You keep me warm)

by itsjustnoise



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: F/F, basically all of twice appears, help i am trash, twicelights has ended my miserable existence, twicelightsSG
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-28 11:16:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19811164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsjustnoise/pseuds/itsjustnoise
Summary: Chaeyoung's left side should not be this empty, she shouldn't be feeling this empty.





	Stars bloom from your fingertips (You keep me warm)

The space beside Chaeyoung feels too empty as she walks towards their departure gate, dragging a hand unconsciously through the air. It's cold as well, goosebumps dotting her arms as she rubs them in a futile attempt to warm herself up. She hasn't felt this gnawing chill in a long time, she realizes with a start, already growing comfortable with a warmth by her side that she now knew she couldn't live without. A shadow passes by to her left and Chaeyoung lifts her gaze from the ground to meet Tzuyu's soft smile. Her friend nudges her shoulder, her only solace from the flashing cameras in Changi Airport at 2 am in the morning. To her, Twicelights ended only 4 hours ago, their makeup and costumes had been a killer to remove. Even now, Chaeyoung can still can hear how the Singapore Onces had cheered loudly for them, echoes of booming music and confetti guns ringing in her ears. And the mint green lights, her mind decides to helpfully remind her. Through her tears, they had sparkled like stars, bright like her smile. Chaeyoung bites down hard on her bottom lip and Tzuyu glances down at her in alarm. She moves closer, nudges Chaeyoung again and Chaeyoung blinks. She had not realize that Tzuyu had moved a little ways off, the space to her left had been left empty for a while now.

"I can hear you thinking, dwarf." Tzuyu murmurs as Chaeyoung rubs tiredly at her eyes. "My head won't shut up." She whispers back, too tired to fight back and Tzuyu sighs. This conversation was a long time coming, she was surprised that Chaeyoung had lasted as long as she did. So she moves closer, to Chaeyoung's left and links their arms. "Better?" Chaeyoung nods gratefully, thankful that Tzuyu understands. The space on her left had never been empty before, but it had been for the past 48 hours, the first time since their debut. And the uncomfortable way her stomach had not stopped turning just further reminded her of it. Every time they stopped to talk to the fans during the concert, Chaeyoung would become painfully aware of the empty space to her left. And every time that happened, the lips on her wrist burned red hot. She needed to be distracted, she didn't need another reminder that they were one member down. So Chaeyoung sighs again and closes her eyes, letting Tzuyu tug her towards wherever they were suppose to go. Hears Tzuyu mumble something to someone, maybe it's their manager, maybe it's Jihyo, she doesn't care. Because when she closes her eyes, mint green stars fall from the sky and explode into nothing, their flashes blinding her underneath her eyelids. And when she finally makes it to her airplane seat, Chaeyoung crashed into a fitful sleep, dreaming of penguins and strawberries and flames.

Arriving back in Korea meant more cameras to face, Chaeyoung disgruntedly blinks herself awake when she feels a gentle hand on her arm, smells barely there jasmine and mint. And in the span of a breath, her traitorous heart had dared to hope. But she opens her eyes to see Jihyo and her soaring heart hits the ground with a solid thump that only she hears. "We're landing in 20 minutes." Jihyo tells her, and Chaeyoung nods, looking out of the window on her left and sees clear skies, clouds like speckled cotton candy below her. "We'll be home soon." Jihyo says and when Chaeyoung doesn't respond immediately, falls silent as she fiddles with the blanket that they were sharing. But Chaeyoung had remembered how badly Jihyo had been crying just hours before, she was not the only one with a same aged friend in this group after all. And as the leader with arguably more responsibilities on her already thin shoulders, the smile Jihyo had been keeping on her face only showed how mature she actually was. With a start, Chaeyoung realized how selfish she was being. So she pokes Jihyo cheek and doesn't miss the way her leader's already big eyes widen just fraction. "Thanks for waking me, eonnie." A blink, and then the corner of Jihyo's mouth quirk upwards. "We'll be home soon." She repeats and her fingers still, laying flat on worn wool. You'll see her again, is what Chaeyoung hears instead and she huffs a quiet bark of laughter as the tattoo on her wrist burns, burns, burns.

The ride home from the airport felt unnaturally long, the members all fell back asleep as soon as their head hit the headrests of the van. Chaeyoung drifts in and out of unconsciousness, mind too loud to fall asleep completely. Music was not helping her in the slightest, what she needed was back in the dormitory. Then, the van pulls into the highway and promptly brakes, jerking most of them out of their sleep. Amidst grumbles of 'ow my head' and 'what happened', Chaeyoung hears their manager apologize. She looks out of tinted windows and sees that they were stuck in a traffic jam, her stomach rolling uncomfortably when she realizes that the normally long drive back would only take longer. But before she closes her eyes again, she is squished from both sides, the two remaining Japanese members snuggling into her shoulders. "Eonnie?" She whispers into Sana's hair, mindful of the other members sleeping. Momo and Sana only hum into her neck, and Chaeyoung feels Momo squeeze her right hand. She understands why they are doing this of course, understands that they know she must miss her too. But despite their shared warmth, the chill on her left only lessens a tiny bit, the real remedy more potent than anything else. "Wait a little longer?" Chaeyoung sucks in a breath, she didn't know when Momo had started talking but she is grateful that she did. It distracts her from the static in her head and the mint green lights that never seem to dim.

The van slows to a halt outside familiar gates and Chaeyoung cannot stop the smile that spills onto her face, Momo and Sana untangling themselves from her. A quick glance at the clock on the dashboard tells her that it is already 6 in the afternoon, her left side is cold again. Everyone piles out of the van, dragging their suitcases behind them as one of their managers tap them in, Chaeyoung has never missed the monotone beep as much as she did. But her feet freezes as she takes a step towards the metal doors, lingering at the back of the group, suddenly apprehensive. Tzuyu bumps into her from the back and gives her a look. And Chaeyoung sighs before following her in. For 8 girls and their managers hauling their things into a once silent dormitory, Chaeyoung thinks that they were surprisingly quiet. But all thoughts fly out of her head when she notices that the door to her room is slightly ajar. She clearly remembers closing it before they left for the airport. Then, someone is tugging her suitcase out of her hand and Chaeyoung turns to find Dahyun grinning at her cheekily, Tzuyu watching the interaction with a small smile. "Go on ahead, we'll crash elsewhere." The lips burn again but Chaeyoung can feel the heat receding with every step she takes towards the doors. And when she enters the room and smells jasmine, the pain in her heart vanishes so fast, it was almost like it had never been there in the first place.

Mina looked the most beautiful when she was asleep, her face relaxed and mouth slightly open. This Mina is Chaeyoung's favorite, the one that was unaffected by the horrors of the world, safe in her own little dreamland. And surrounded by the plushies on Chaeyoung's bed, she feels her heart take flight, soaring almost high as the plane had been, she feels speckled white clouds floating through her fingers. She looked so peaceful, Chaeyoung almost didn't want to wake her up. But she didn't have to, Mina stirs awake on her own when Chaeyoung reaches to smooth out a crease on her forehead. "Chaeng?" She murmurs, voice raspy from sleep and Chaeyoung has to grip the bed post for some self control. "Morning eonnie," She jokes lamely instead and is rewarded with a smile she likes to think is only reserved for her. Mina pushes herself up and takes Chaeyoung's face in cool hands, pinching her cheeks. She doesn't say anything, doesn't need to, Chaeyoung hears 'I've missed you' and 'I'm glad you're home safe' loud and clear. She hops down from the metal ladder and offers Mina her hand, grinning the brightest she has ever did in the past 48 hours. "Come now, my lady. The other members await." And when Mina giggles and moves to take her hand, Chaeyoung realizes that her left side is no longer cold.

Later after Mina has greeted all the members again and they had already eaten dinner (It had been a messy affair, with Sana and Momo smothering their youngest sister in hugs and kisses and crying in Japanese. And with Tzuyu and Dahyun side-eyeing Chaeyoung from behind their bowls of rice.), she finds Chaeyoung sprawled on the couch with Jeongyeon and Nayeon, lazily watching a documentary about penguins."Chaeng," She begins hesitantly, unsure if she wanted to disturb the peace and then watching how Chaeyoung literally slams into attention, sitting up and shoving Jeongyeon's legs off her. "Yeah?" She answers breathlessly. "Wanna go for a walk?" "Sure." The way Chaeyoung answers so quickly makes it so laughably obvious, Nayeon has to slap Jeongyeon multiple times to get her to be quiet because the penguin baby had lost its mother and it's sad Yoo Jeongyeon, how can you be laughing? Chaeyoung comes out of her room with two jackets, and she tosses one to Mina, who pulls it on immediately. "Come home by 10," Nayeon calls out as they head to the doors and smiles when she hears a chorus of "Yes, Nayeon eonnie." Jeongyeon turns just in time to see how Mina slips naturally into the space by Chaeyoung's left and smiles to herself. But when she returns her attention back to the screen, she sees Nayeon looking at their backs with an unreadable expression. Nayeon blinks when she caught staring and turns back to the documentary, her movements languid but Jeongyeon has known her for long enough to notice how her ears, usually hidden by straight black hair, are a bright red. And Jeongyeon can't resist teasing her about it. "Are you jealous?" She wiggles her eyebrows and promptly howls in pain when Nayeon smacks her in the face with the pillow.

Mina and Chaeyoung walk in silence, and Chaeyoung realizes that Mina is leading them to the playground. It's late enough for most kids to be back in their homes and early enough for loiterers to still be hiding in the back allies. A gust of wind blows and Mina shivers, so Chaeyoung doesn't think, just tugs her closer with her left hand. She prays that Mina can't feel her staccato heartbeat through the jacket sleeves. "So, how was the concert?" Chaeyoung swirls the answers in her mouth, the words tasted bitter and charred. The lips on her wrist pulse with liquid heat, once, twice. Empty, she wants to say. Cold, different, uncomfortable. But she bites them back and swallows them down. "It was an experience." She says instead and Mina frowns, tone accusing. "You're avoiding the question." Chaeyoung shrugs, tired. "You know the answer, eonnie." She mumbles and goes to the swings, hearing Mina's soft footfalls crunching through the wood chips behind her. "Was it hard?" Chaeyoung nods, sitting down on the smooth rubber and kicks her feet back and forth. "The hardest thing I've ever done." The raw honesty in her voice even surprises herself, Chaeyoung had never been good at speaking, most rappers were. They usually preferred to write their feelings and thoughts, or in her case, draw. Mina blinks before she crouches down in front of Chaeyoung, who resolutely won't meet her eyes.

"I'm so proud of you." She smiles and Chaeyoung finally feels the tears that have been pooling at the corner of her eyes since she left for Singapore drip down her cheeks. "It sucks that you weren't there, eonnie." She sniffs into her sleeve, pressing a palm into her eyes in a desperate attempt to stop the tears. Mina catches her hands almost instantly, pulling them into her own. "Don't do that." She chastisises, pressing her lips lightly to the tattoo on her left wrist. Chaeyoung feels her cheeks burn, burn, burn but this heat didn't hurt in the slightest. It was the warmth that she missed, it was the warmth that only Mina could give her. They sat in silence for a while, Mina gently running her thumb along Chaeyoung's knuckles, kissing the lips on Chaeyoung's wrist till her sniffles slowed and eventually stopped. Chaeyoung wished with all her heart that she could stop time right at this moment and bottle up everything she was feeling, it was a memory she knew was going to get her through the inevitable tough times that Twice would have to face. "We'll go back together." Chaeyoung lifted her gaze from the ground and meets Mina's eyes. They sparkled so brightly, and Chaeyoung couldn't help but compare them to the galaxy and its million stars. But Mina wasn't done. "From now on, we'll be together. All 9 of us." "Promise?" Chaeyoung hates how vulnerable she sounds, the way her voice trembles. But Mina's voice doesn't shake, is stable enough for the both of them. "Promise."

Much, much later, when they quietly let themselves back into the dormitory, they will find Nayeon sleeping on the couch and Jeongyeon watching some variety show with one arm wrapped protectively around her. "It's past your curfew." Jeongyeon deadpans, switching the television off and placing the remote on the empty cushion beside her. "When did you care about curfew?" Chaeyoung raised her eyebrow. "I cared about it around the same time you two started holding hands." Jeongyeon shoots back and smiles when both Mina and Chaeyoungs' face flush a deep crimson. "Good night, eonnie." Chaeyoung hurriedly says, pulling Mina behind her as she echoes the greeting in a quieter tone and Jeongyeon nods at the both of them as they disappear into the hallway. Nayeon shifts a little in her arms at that, a small frown on her lips as she twists her face into the space where Jeongyeon's shoulder meets her neck. Jeongyeon feels her cling tighter and squeezes back in response, Nayeon has always liked being held. She presses a soft kiss into the crown of her head and counts to 10 before she feels Nayeon move again and pulls back just as she speaks into her skin. "Did you just kiss me?" "No, I think you were dreaming." Nayeon huffs, annoyed. "I'm pretty sure you just kissed me." Jeongyeon's body rumbles with laughter, she can feel Nayeon's pout on her skin.

A comfortable silence blankets them then, "Are the kids back?" Nayeon asks and Jeongyeon hums her affirmation. "Awesome. Let's go sleep on our beds. My back isn't as young as it used to be." Nayeon laughs to herself and pushes herself off Jeongyeon but the younger girl catches her and tugs her back into her embrace. "And I'll still love you anyway." And Nayeon's ears burn, burn, burn, a bright red that was awfully familiar as Jeongyeon laughs while clutching at her stomach. "What is with you today, Yoo Jeongyeon?" And the laughter cuts off abruptly into another cry of pain.

"Jeongyeon eonnie doesn't actually care about curfew."

"Well yeah, but she cares about Nayeon eonnie."

"Everyone knows that. The both of them should stop dancing around their feelings."

"Technically you did too."

"I feel so attacked right now, you're lucky you're cute."

"I'm lucky I'm yours."

**Author's Note:**

> Twicelights was on Saturday. My emotions are high. It's too hot to sleep and my brain won't shut up. I have cried too much in the last 48 hours. I saw Twice in the flesh. No I am not over it. Like seriously, GODDESSES I WILL NEVER REGRET STANNING THEM. I miss Mina so so much. Please get well soon and come back to all of us. To everyone who is reading this, I hope you guys stay healthy :)


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